Me

I'll try to paint you a self portrait. I'm 6'2 and slightly overweight. (Truthfully, the word "slightly" should be removed from the last sentence) I use to be in fairly decent shape, however, recent years have not been so kind. I'm balding on top. All of my hair seems to be falling off my head and taking up residence on my back. My eyes are deep-set blue. My goatee is often trimmed crooked. Not on purpose. But, at some point I have to stop the morning cycle of alternating shaving down the left and right sides in a failed attempt to attain symmetry.

I'm 27 years old, but if age were measured by emotional maturity, I'm guessing I would still be a teenager. Probably an early teen. I'm often impulsive, have little self discipline, and am particularly fond of Doritos. I'd like to think of myself as witty. My cousin insists that I am only funny one day per month. I refer to it as my "funny period." And by period I mean...well, I'm hoping you catch the inference.

My toes are extremely hairy.